Love is
by aangxxxkatara
Summary: Dirty, Used... Disgrace, corrupted. How could he ever love him again? One out of thirty-three men will be raped... and he was the one. RaitoxL rated M for sensitive material and mentions of rape


Disclaimer: I don't in any way or form own Death Note… if I did… you'd know anyways happy reading.

* * *

'_No… no, no, no!'_ Running as fast as his shaking legs would carry him the dark haired detective stumbled down the rain soaked street. The flashing light's and honking horns of the city mixing with the sounds of the thunder and the flashes of lightening, confusing the distraught man even more.

Around him noise blared, car tires squeaking as they sped over the water, people, most likely drunks or drug addicts, screamed and yelled at each other. Yet the loudest noise of all, wasn't really there. Raspy breathing, the horrid smell of alcohol hitting his nose, the low insane cackling. His own broken sobs, his pleas, his cries for help. All unheard by any other human as the drunk had his way with him.

_No…_ Disgrace. Dirty. Used. Nothing seemed fit. To the corrupted raven there seemed to be no word strong enough to describe himself now. "I'm sorry…" He cried softly to no one, not that anyone would ever hear him anyways. "I'm so, so sorry… I-I told him to stop…"

Tears clouding his vision he didn't see the woman until he ran into her. "Hey! Watch it!" Shaking his head the dark haired man stuttered out a 'sorry' as the prostitute glared at him as he shoved past. _Home… I need to get home…_ he thought desperately as he turned down the next street. Only to freeze as soon as he looked down the road in front of him.

No cars zoomed passed. No people stood along the sides smoking and fighting. Rain, concrete and the haunting darkness. _No… This_ is how it started to begin with. Backing up the dark haired man shook his head, doe eyes wide. 'Get a hold of your self. He's long gone. You're alone. You need to get home, this is the shortest route.'

Biting his lip he lurched forward, eyes staring straight a head. Disgrace. The filthy feeling crawled over his battered skin like maggots on the dead. Vile. Disgusting. The feeling of him, the horrid man as he touched him, broke him, _raped_ him. 'Please no…' He cried, tears clouding his vision again.

Coming to the end of the Tokyo street he let out a shaky, tear filled breath, his dark eyes on the house across the street. Its wide windows covered in their light blue curtains welcoming him, beckoning him home. The dark blue door was shut but he knew it would be unlocked. He knew sitting just on the other side _he'd_ be waiting, worried sick.

"Home…" the raven whispered shakily, running across the deserted, puddle soaked street. Barely turning the knob he shoved the door open and collapsed on the floor in front of the open door, letting the wind blow the freezing rain in. From the kitchen the sound of scraping pans was heard and the slamming of what the broken man guessed was the oven door.

"Where have you b---!" The brunet was cut short as he saw the condition of the other. "Oh dear… L! What happened?!" The raven haired detective felt his eye lids droop as a sudden need for sleep over took him. It barely registered in his clouded mind that there were kind arms around him. All he felt though was the sickening felling of the rapists hands on him, holding him down, using him.

"NO!" L screamed shoving Raito away. "Get off me! Get off! I'm dirty! I'm corrupted! I'm a disgrace!" Gold eyes searched dark lifeless ones as he tried desperately to push the other away. "How could you love me?" He screamed, voice cracking as tears fell from broken eyes, mixing with the blood and tears already present. "HOW?"

"Please, L, calm down." Raito cooed, pulling the distraught man onto his lap. "Please, shh, I love you because I love you. Nothing anyone does will ever change that. Please tell me what happened love…"

"He raped me… he raped me…"

That night, the anniversary dinner went cold, untouched and uneaten. The candles in the bedroom burnt out, the bath went unused. The romantic evening planned, instantly disappeared.

That night, an innocent raven was assaulted and raped.

That night, the two sat there in front of the open door as the rain poured, and cried.

One out of thirty-three men will be raped, and that night it broke Raito's heart to know, his husband was the one.

* * *

A/N Please note I do not think rape is funny or a joking matter, though I may joke about it, it's a serious issue that I want to make clear.

Its. Not. Funny.

- Mama L


End file.
